Why learning a language is one of the best things you can do

A long (long) time ago, I did a degree in Hispanic Studies and spent a year living in Madrid. Looking back on it now, I can't quite believe some of the things I did while I was there: finding somewhere to live, negotiating the return of my deposit from the terrifying landladies (elderly sisters who lived downstairs) when I found somewhere better to live, taking classes at university, writing exams and - scariest of all - getting a haircut (I can barely explain what I want done in English, let alone Spanish).

But unfortunately I haven't really kept it up in the ten years since then, and these days although I'm still reasonably comfortable reading and writing Spanish, I've lost all confidence in my ability to have a conversation - which, in turn prevents me from practising. It's a bit of a vicious circle. And it's sad because it's an incredibly useful skill to have.

There seems to be a belief among native speakers of English that it's not necessary to learn any other languages, because our own is so widely spoken. A recent study conducted as part of the European Survey on Language Competences (ESLC) found that out of 14 countries across Europe, teenagers in England ranked worst in language learning. And yesterday it was reported that while more English fifteen- and sixteen-year-olds are taking languages at GCSE than two years ago because of changes in the education system, only one in ten of these go on to study them after the age of sixteen. But the fact is that although English is one of the most widely spoken languages in the world, there are still great opportunities to be had for those of us who are willing to make the effort to learn a different one, and it's a fantastic way to stand out from the crowd. Here are just some of the reasons learning a language is one of the best things you can do.

GET A JOB

Firstly, and probably most obviously, a second (or third) language on your CV looks good, especially if you're applying for a job with an international company. It means you can talk to clients from other countries and close business deals overseas, and it also makes a good talking point at interview, especially if the language you're learning is a bit unusual. And it shows that you've had the determination to learn it; you don't just know another language overnight and to reach the point where you can honestly say you speak it with any degree of fluency takes effort. The fact that you've put in that effort and stuck with it looks good to a potential employer.

CLOSE THE DEAL

Speaking of business deals, a lot of people think English is the language of international commerce. But how much more impressive does it look to a potential client if you can hold the negotiations in their own language? Between you and another rep, who's offering an equally good deal but hasn't shown them the same respect by learning a little of their language, they're much more likely to choose you.

SEE THE WORLD

Knowing another language gives you opportunities to travel, live and work abroad, and you're more likely to be accepted by the locals if you can at least manage a few words in their language. You'll look less like an arrogant foreigner and more like someone who genuinely wants to be a part of their country and culture. It'll also enable you to stand on your own two feet and not be dependent on others to translate for you, which means you'll get more out of the experience too.

MEET YOUR PERFECT PARTNER

You never know who you're going to meet when you go travelling - you might meet that special someone and even if they speak English, that's no reason why you shouldn't learn their language too. Not only that, but if you have met someone from another country, either on holiday or at home, you'll want to impress their family - they could be in your in-laws one day! It looks great to your boyfriend's mum if you can greet her in her own language, and you're much more likely to be accepted and welcomed into the family than someone who didn't bother.

MAKE FRIENDS

And finally, learning a language is about communication, and as such it's quite a sociable skill. You wouldn't expect to go to a French class and not speak to anyone. Even if you're learning at home on your own, at some point you're going to use what you know in conversation - otherwise why bother? So just the very fact that you're learning is going to broaden your social circle, helping you meet new people and make friends with whom you share a common interest.

There are lots of other reasons to learn a language: it helps you understand your own language better; it improves your memory; it means you can understand what they're singing about at the opera. But the main point is this - learning a language opens doors that might otherwise have stayed firmly shut. It's a way to be noticed and appreciated by employers, colleagues, clients, friends and more-than-friends. And it's also really fun! So maybe it's time I get over my fear and start practising my Spanish again...

Hasta luego!

Why is dressing to impress nothing but stress?

I'm going clubbing tonight (yes, you read that right). This isn't something I do very often and my main concern at the moment is what I'm going to wear. The dress code is apparently 'sexy and stylish', which are not two words I tend to associate with my wardrobe very often. Fortunately the friends I'm going with don't know what to wear either so at least I'm not alone.

This got me thinking about fashion and how the clothes we wear can make a statement. At award ceremonies like the Oscars, all most people really want to know is what the stars are wearing, and they're judged based on that rather than anything they may have done on the big screen. The goal seems to be to make the biggest impact on the red carpet, and often we remember who won in the fashion stakes more than who won the awards inside.

But what about the rest of us, who don't have a huge budget to spend on a show-stealing dress for one night? 

Some people just know what looks good on them and carry it off perfectly. They have their own style and they're completely confident about putting different items together. And because they're confident, it works. If, like me, you're a bit self-conscious when trying a new outfit, it shows in your body language and you'll probably spend the night fiddling with your clothes, convinced they don't look right. Instead of 'do I look good?' the question in your mind will be 'do I fit in?' and you'll be more concerned about blending into the crowd than standing out and getting noticed, whether that's by potential dates or just in general.

So my considered fashion advice would be: wear what makes you feel comfortable. That doesn't mean always wearing the same thing - wearing an outfit you know and love but teaming it with some unusual accessories can make just as much of an impact. The most important thing, especially on a night out, is to relax and enjoy yourself; this is what will get you noticed for the right reasons.

Of course not everyone agrees with me. I'll leave you with a lesson on picking up girls from the legend that is Howard Wolowitz.

Have fun tonight, whatever you're doing! I'm off to raid my wardrobe (again).

Ten things I know now, that I didn't know a week ago

I've been writing this blog for a week now, so I thought I'd take this opportunity to look back over the last few days. It's quite a scary thing starting a blog, not knowing if anybody will want to read it or be interested in what you're going to say, but we're now closing in on 1,500 hits so thank you to everyone who's visited, read, commented and shared the blog so far. I want to be sure I'm posting on subjects that are relevant and interesting, so please do get in touch in the comments section below to say hello and let me know what you want to read more about.

(By the way, I'm told there might be a problem posting comments in Safari, so if you have something you want to say, please try a different browser. I'd love to hear from you so please don't be put off!)

It's been an interesting few days - I've thought about things I'd never considered before and let off a bit of steam on issues I've been raging about for years. Here are a few of the things I've learnt this week:

1. Standing out from the crowd, in all areas of life, is often just a case of following a few simple rules, and is sometimes as easy as doing things right.

2. I'm almost certainly not the only person in my office who sometimes feels they shouldn't be there.

3. Confidence is all in the mind, but the mind can be tricked by something as simple as changing how you stand for two minutes.

4. Interviews for jobs in teaching sound seriously scary.
5. It's possible to spend three weeks locked in a shop window with 300 poisonous spiders and live to tell the tale (although this does not mean I'll be trying it any time soon).

6. Quoting Voltaire in a job interview is a good thing.
7. Practising the 'power pose' in the work kitchen is not a good thing. People will laugh.
8. High street charity collectors are not, on the whole, very popular people.
9. Hiring a billboard costs £500 (you never know when that knowledge might come in handy).
10. And an interesting fact that I just read - apparently when trying out a new pen, 97% of people write their own name (this information is courtesy of the weekly newsletter from Innocent Drinks - definitely recommended, it'll brighten up your Fridays and you'll learn all kinds of random trivia).

Have a great weekend everyone!

Just Asking - the competitive world of charity events

Tomorrow is Red Nose Day here in the UK. But don't be fooled by the name into thinking this annual fundraising event is just a single day. For weeks now celebrities have been taking part in challenges like rafting the length of the Zambezi or doing 25-hour comedy gigs. One Direction have released a charity single. Red noses are being sold in shops and online; this year they're called Dinosesaurs and there are three different ones to collect. And we're all being encouraged to get involved and 'do something funny for money'.

Comic Relief, the charity behind Red Nose Day, have been doing fantastic work - and keeping us all entertained - for 25 years, and I have nothing but respect for anyone who raises money for charity. I recently sponsored several of my colleagues who ran a half marathon, and bought tickets for a charity raffle last year, despite literally never having won a raffle prize in my life (including the time when every single member of my family won something except me - this was 20 years ago but it still hurts).

I don't have much recent experience of fundraising, although I did once help my friend raise money for her sponsored trek in China - as I recall it involved standing outside Sainsbury's with a collecting bucket, singing songs from The Lion King, and hugging some old people (not all at the same time). But I wanted to know how, in a world where we can't turn on the TV or even walk down the street without being asked to donate to one charity or another, you can convince people to part with their hard-earned cash and support you, and your particular cause, instead of someone else. So I asked around and these were some of the tips I got:

Firstly, choose a charity that means something to you. That way you'll be able to speak passionately about it to people and explain to them how their money can make a difference. You may find that your charity has a special significance for them too, and they have their own story to share. If that's the case, be prepared to listen. It shows you're interested in the cause, and you're not just after their money.

Set yourself a target; be ambitious but realistic. Show your appreciation for any donation, no matter how much it is - it all takes you closer to your goal, and even a small donation may be a lot of money to the person giving it. Offer incentives; a colleague recently promised to run 10k barefoot (literally) if he raised a certain amount in sponsorship. Bleeding feet aren't exactly an incentive - but you get the idea. You could offer something a bit more tempting, like free chocolate for anyone who helps get you over your target amount, for example.

Know when to take no for an answer. A lot of people already donate money to other charities on a regular basis so they have a rule against any additional giving. Others may just not want to sponsor you, and that's their decision - it is their money, after all, and finances are tight for many people at the moment. If you're face to face with someone, observe their body language and know when to back off.

And of course, you need to spread the word. Start with your friends, family and work colleagues, or anyone who you think is likely to donate a decent amount, as it's easier to keep fundraising if you're off to a good start. Then you can start going further: use your social networks like Facebook and Twitter, mention it in forums or online communities, ask your family and friends to tell their friends, put up posters or hand out flyers, add it to your email signature. And there's no harm tweeting your favourite celebrities to see if they'll pass on your request - it might get you a few more pounds!

Be different. If you are hoping to reach a wider audience, the more unusual (and difficult) your event, and the better your story, the more likely you are to get noticed and make headlines. Louise and Geoff, from London, spent the night before their wedding sleeping rough to raise funds for a homeless charity. Australian Nick Le Soeuf locked himself in a shop window for three weeks with 300 poisonous spiders for a children's charity. And New Yorker Sheena Matheiken wore the same dress every day for a year to help children in India. (An unusual charity event also looks great on your CV...)

Thank you to all those who shared their advice. Incidentally, I hope to take part in a marathon later this year (walking, not running - let's not get carried away) so I may well be putting this into practice before too long. You have been warned...

Extreme job hunting - the new normal?

When I mentioned to a colleague that I was starting this blog, he suggested I should write about the UK graduate who spent his last £500 on a billboard in London begging someone to give him a job. Adam Pacitti, who got a first class degree in Media Studies, had sent out over 200 job applications without success, so decided extreme measures were called for. The billboard immediately got picked up on Twitter and his website got 20,000 hits within 24 hours. It took a few weeks, but the investment paid off and Adam's now employed.

I thought I'd see if there were any other examples of this kind of thing, and discovered that not only are there examples - there are loads of them. Nick Begley from New York printed his resume on a chocolate bar wrapper and sent it out to potential employers. Ulrike Schultz from Vienna asked her Twitter followers to help her find a job in London by putting the hashtag #HireUlrike on all their tweets. And in 2009, Alex Kearns, another UK graduate, managed to secure an hour on a plinth in Trafalgar Square to promote his job search.

All these are brilliant examples of using creativity to stand out from the crowd, and it's no surprise that the majority of these 'extreme job hunters', as they've become known in the media, come from marketing, communications or advertising backgrounds. By thinking outside the box, they're proving to potential employers in those industries what they can do.

But it does make me think - how far are we from the day when submitting a regular paper application for a job won't be enough any more? All these ideas sound great and really original, but in my first few minutes of research for this post I'd already found two other examples of people hiring a billboard in order to get noticed by employers. It might be out-of-the-box thinking today, but in a few years' time (or even less) will it only be possible to find a job if we're willing to take such a drastic step? And if everyone's doing it, then it's not a gimmick any more and instead of standing out, we'll just be blending in. Billboards will be the new printed CV. And so it goes on.

Incidentally, there's one more example of people going to extraordinary lengths to find a job - popular BBC TV show The Apprentice, in which candidates battle it out in a series of gruelling 'business tasks' to impress The Boss, Lord Alan Sugar. And yet Stella English, who won the show in 2010, has been in court over the last couple of weeks, telling an employment tribunal that in fact the dream job she competed for never existed and she ended up as an 'overpaid lackey'. So maybe it's not always worth going that extra mile unless you know what you're getting at the end of it.

If anyone does fancy giving extreme job hunting a try, though, Adam Pacitti is now using his Employ Adam website to offer help to others in a similar situation. And he might even make you famous. You never know.

Too many fish in the sea

Online dating is pretty big business these days. Any time you turn on the TV or travel on public transport, there seem to be ads everywhere for Match.com, eHarmony, Plenty of Fish and even Uniform Dating. It appears that the stigma associated with meeting someone online is well and truly forgotten.

In 2009, eHarmony claimed that on average 542 people were getting married in the US every day as a result of meeting on the site. I personally know quite a few people who either met their partner online, are currently online or thinking about going online. And yes, I have tried it myself too.

But with so many people signing up (according to their homepage, POF reckon they have 50,000 new singles registering every day), how on earth are you meant to stand out enough to get noticed?

Now, please bear in mind that I haven't met the love of my life online, but I do know what it is that's grabbed my attention, so here are my tips on how to make a good impression:

PROFILE PICTURE

I'm sorry, I know I shouldn't start with the picture but let's face it, most people do. If you don't have a good picture, chances are potential matches aren't going to click on your profile. For your main profile pic, a head and shoulders shot is ideal, particularly if it shows you having a good time somewhere. (Although maybe not one of you and your ex...) A series of photos of you taking pictures of yourself in the mirror, however - not so good. It looks like you have no friends to take a photo for you, and you never go anywhere interesting. Pictures with a story to them are the best, as it gives you something to talk about.

TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF

Nobody likes doing this bit. In fact a lot of profiles start with the words 'What do I put here?' or 'This is really difficult.' You don't need to write a lot, just make whatever you do write interesting and intriguing enough to make someone want to contact you. Please don't lead with 'I like going out and I like staying in.' So does everyone. Say where you like to go out, describe an unusual hobby, talk about your last holiday and something funny that happened. Throw in a few random facts about yourself, they're always fun and they show you've got a sense of humour. But try and draw the line between a bit random and completely mad!

BE PROACTIVE

Don't just browse profiles waiting for someone to notice you. If you see someone you like, go for it. What do you have to lose? It's online so it's not like approaching someone in a bar where everyone's watching. Sure, it might be a bit disappointing if you've got your hopes up and the other person doesn't reply, but nobody will know except you. And you might just find they've been waiting for you to get in touch with them...

FIRST MESSAGE

If you've found someone you're interested in, sadly, just as in real life, it doesn't mean that they're automatically going to be interested in you. Especially if you send them a forgettable message like 'Hi, how was your day?' Just as you should when applying for jobs, read their profile, pick up on anything that particularly interests you and mention that. Ask questions to show you're interested. For instance, I'm in a book club, so an obvious question would be to ask me what we're reading this month. I'm happy to talk about that because it's something I enjoy and it means the guy's paid a bit of attention to what I've written. Also, don't send the same message to more than one person (especially if that message is 'Luuuuussssssshhhhhhh' - yes, that happened) - chances are, especially if they're local, they may know each other (this also happened)!

DON'T BE A PEST/STALKER

If you get a reply to your message, great! You've successfully broken through and stood out from the crowd, and now you can get on to the fun part of getting to know each other. But don't get noticed for the wrong reason. If you've sent a message and not got a reply, don't nag. There may be a perfectly legitimate reason, or they just may not be interested. Accept it gracefully and move on.

So those are my hints on how to stand out online. Once you get to the chatting and meeting up part, you're on your own...

Any online dating success stories? What attracted you to your partner?

What are we doing here?

Hello and thank you for visiting my blog. I hope you'll be glad you did.

So why am I (and you) here? (Reading this I mean, not generally - that's a whole other blog.)

Well, it started at work where, among other things, I look after the filtering of job applications whenever we're recruiting. And every time, I get really annoyed and start ranting at my long-suffering colleagues. Why? Because all the applications are the same. And they all make the same mistakes. And it means when a good application does actually arrive, it makes me stupidly happy. Which in turn makes me sad.

Knowing how to make your CV stand out from everyone else's should be common sense, but obviously it isn't - and I'm fairly sure I made some of these mistakes myself before I saw the process from the other side. So I thought I'd write the definitive rule book on what to do (and what NOT to do) to market yourself and be different - in a good way - and hopefully get hired as a result.

Then it occurred to me - this doesn't just apply to jobs. There are so many areas of life where we need to stand out in order to succeed. As any of my friends will tell you, this is not an area that I tend to excel in. In fact, if anything my special skill is blending in to the background. So as I go along, I'll be attempting to follow my own advice (something else I've never been great at) and would love to hear your tips, opinions and comments as well.